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DIRTY ENGLISH

DIRTY ENGLISH

by | Jul 24, 2018 | Short Story, T, Tom Leins

Kenneth Spate speaks in a nerve-damaged monotone. I can barely hear what he is saying over the splashback of the amateur shower show. +++++The tepid gush stops abruptly, and the crumpled-looking compere steps forward. His name is Louie Drambuie, and his main hobbies...
XXXMAS BOOGALOO

XXXMAS BOOGALOO

by | Jan 23, 2018 | Short Story, T, Tom Leins

Christmas Eve… in the drunk tank. +++++I’m on a concrete bed, sleeping off a heavy session. It started with a quiet pint in the Cock & Whistle and ended with a knife-fight in the Dirty Lemon. The other guy had a fucking meat cleaver, so I must have been drunk to...
Dry Salvage

Dry Salvage

by | Aug 22, 2017 | Short Story, T, Tom Leins

Spaulding was in his eighties, and looked far too vulnerable to put a proper beating on, but I had agreed to give Marie Andretti at least five of his teeth in order to get my full fee. They came loose effortlessly, and the old bastard bled like a stuck pig regardless....
Blue Christmas

Blue Christmas

by | Dec 25, 2016 | Short Story, T, Tom Leins

“Why was Father Christmas upset when he got a sweater for Christmas?” +++++I shrug. +++++“Because he was hoping for a screamer or a moaner.” +++++Clive Clayhill laughs gutturally, then offers me a nasty grin – his rotten teeth are the same colour as Elaine’s gravy. I...
Other People’s Blood

Other People’s Blood

by | Sep 13, 2016 | Short Story, T, Tom Leins

It is an ugly Friday, mid-morning. I am drinking in the softcore lounge at the Black Regent. +++++At least it used to be called the Black Regent… the hotel was taken over by a national hotel chain two years ago, and the new name escapes me. +++++Two men I don’t...