Pizza Mama and Dairy Queen

I was down on my knees behind the Dairy Queen when the idea hit me. Buddy standing before me had no idea what was going through my head, and I don’t think he was thinking much at all, just making a godawful racket about things, moaning away like it was his first ever blow job.
+++++In fact, it might’ve been.
+++++I snuck a peek back down at the bar to make sure nobody was checking up on him. Dairy Queen was just down the alley from the bar, close enough to make a quick in and out, but far enough away that the patrons of that fine establishment couldn’t hear buddy moaning away behind the dumpster.
+++++The bar kept the back door propped open, mostly for staff going out for smokes, but it helped Jenna and I make a quick exit. It was our front office, you might say.
+++++All the action happened in the alleyway, along the back stoops and receiving doors of other buildings along that block. We had a good thing going.
+++++Buddy’s thighs shook, and he had the whole thrusting hip action going on, his hand wrapped into my hair, and when I looked up his eyes were practically rolled into his head, groaning to all get out. I was counting down from ten when he blew his wad at seven.
+++++Goddamnit.
+++++I liked to pull off just before they shoot – they’re gonna cum anyway, may as well not be inside my mouth. Honestly, once you’ve done a few of them in a row, something about the taste never quite leaves you by the end of the night.
+++++I was trying to spit real discrete-like and wiping at my mouth when I saw Jenna walking with her guy behind the pizza place on the other side of the bar.
+++++We each had our own territory, see.
+++++She was Pizza Mama and I was Dairy Queen, or at least we were to our regulars.
+++++I was already on my feet when buddy was blushing and stammering like he was asking to marry me, or anything to make things less awkward while he tried to wipe the dribbling cum off his cock and tuck his sack back inside his pants.
+++++“Uh – yeah, that was – I mean, can I –” he stood there, still breathing heavy and blushing like a fool. Clean shaven college kid, poor guy, probably just hard up.
+++++Though it might of been his first ever decent blowjob. Gets hard to tell after a while.
+++++I smiled and brushed my lips to his cheek, “That’ll be twenty, tiger.”
+++++He blushed even deeper, and then fumbled for his pockets, pulling out two twenties. “Uh, a tip – do I – can I tip you?”
+++++I tried not to burst out laughing, and smiled sweetly, which is just what he wanted. I picked the bills out of his hand, “Oh, that’s so nice of you, honey, you come on back anytime now. Just out look for Dairy Queen.”
+++++He stared blankly at me.
+++++I waved my hand at the building behind me, a sign for ‘Dairy Queen – Receiving’ posted above the back door.
+++++He nodded.
+++++“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to see someone back inside the bar.”
+++++“Uh huh.”
+++++As we walked back to the bar together, his hand brushed mine, I guess to make himself feel like we were dating or something, and I picked up his hand as I stepped in the bar. “Well, honey, I hope I’ll see you around.”
+++++He nodded, a stupid grin still plastered across his face.
+++++I did a quick turn into the ladies’ washroom, and as the door shut behind me, I knew he’d be back. Maybe even tomorrow night.
+++++Bending over the bathroom sink I pulled my mouthwash and toothpaste out of my bag. Time for some serious dental hygiene. I know some girls use condoms and avoid this whole mess, but the guys complain about them. Swishing my mouth out, I horked into the sink, and looked up as the bathroom door opened again and Jenna walked in.
+++++“Mind if I borrow some?” She grabbed the mouthwash.
+++++“Help yourself.”
+++++Between spitting and rinsing I laid out my plan.
+++++It didn’t take much to convince Jenna to switch things up a little between us. We’d still pick up the guys, take them out back, and the other one would be there waiting with a baseball bat. When one of us went down, buddy’d get knocked out, and we’d go through his pockets.
+++++Even splitting the proceeds between us, it had to pay better than twenty bucks a pop.
+++++I grabbed the mouthwash and rinsed and spat again, and then blotted my lips with a tissue. “You know, what if we get a guy with no cash – everybody’s got debit or credit cards now.”
+++++She shook her head. “I got a friend who’d take cell phones. Jewelry. We’d always come out ahead.”
+++++“But what about the guys? When they’re knocked out, I mean.” I was starting to think things through a little bit more. I forgot about the unconscious body thing.
+++++She shrugged. “Leave them beside the dumpster. Nobody’d find them ‘till morning. Or they’d probably just think they blacked out or something.”
+++++I nodded. She was smart, that Jenna.
+++++Jenna leaned over the sink and studied herself in the mirror, swiping on fresh lipstick and as she pulled out her compact, she paused, and pressed her finger to the dark splotches around her eyes; green bruises fading to sickly yellow.
+++++“Do they look bad?”
+++++“Naw, you just look tired. Nobody’d see them out back.”

*

+++++We were ready the next night. I was sitting beside the bar when a familiar looking guy came up to me, and pretty soon he followed me out back to my usual place behind the Dairy Queen, half buried in the shadows alongside the dumpster.
+++++I smiled at him as I dropped to my knees and tugged at his fly, and suddenly his hands twisted themselves into my hair, shoving my face into his cock. “You like it rough, don’t you bitch.”
+++++My mouth opened out of reflex, and he shoved it inside; I gagged, retching, and trying to twist away. My stomach rolled and I thought I’d puke while he slammed my face, his cock hitting the back of my throat again and again.
+++++Fuck – where the hell was Jenna?
+++++Somebody was screaming – it might of been me – and then there was a thud, and buddy just kinda went stiff, standing still. Then another flat thud of wood on flesh, and he dropped like a ton of bricks, slow whoosh of air leaking out of him like he’d deflated or something.
+++++He lurched sideways and I managed to move out of the way as he was coming down. He sprawled on the blacktop, face up.
+++++As he lay between us, Jenna stared at me, the bat still raised above her head. She was breathing heavy, and her eyes pretty wide. I guessed she was a bit shocked, and I started to go through his pockets when he twitched, a little, his eyes rolled into his head all fluttery.
+++++Jenna didn’t say a word, she just raised that bat above her shoulders and brought it down again, this time on his head.
+++++There was a sharp crack and a wet sound, like a melon just split open. His whole body jerked, as if a jolt of electricity shot through him, and then he was still.
+++++She raised the bat again.
+++++I jumped back. “Hey – what’re you –”
+++++Jenna brought that bat down again, and again; a whole spray of pulpy pink followed every upswing and shot out everywhere. Everything – the bat, her arms, and mine – got spattered with goo.
+++++“Hey – wait – that’s not the –”
+++++I stopped talking. There was no point. She wasn’t hearing me anyway. Jenna sometime gets like that.
+++++Eventually she got tired, and she stopped. “Do you wanna go through his pockets?”
+++++I nodded, still keeping my eye on the bat. I tried not to look at the place his head had been, pink stained flecks of goop, like oatmeal were everywhere. As I pulled out his wallet, and opened it to a couple hundred bucks in small bills, I smiled at her. “Looks like he was planning to score big tonight.”
+++++“Yeah,” she shrugged. “He was one of my regulars.”
+++++I stared down at the body for a long while and then looked up at her. Jenna wiped at her arms with her hoodie.
+++++She shrugged again. “Sick bastard. Always wanted to cum in my mouth.”

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Liz McAdams

Liz McAdams is a short, sharp writer and lives in the wilds of Canada with her black cats and her laptop. Her work appears in places around the world, including The Horror Zine, Yellow Mama, Shotgun Honey, Feminine Collective, Near to the Knuckle, and Twisted Sister. You can connect with Liz through https://lizmcadams.wordpress.com/

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One thought on “Pizza Mama and Dairy Queen”

  1. Nice! Damn, that was good. Smooth, well worked prose. Worthwhile climax. I’d tip $20. Wearing a condom and helmet on next trip to Dairy Queen, though.

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